From the moment we are born, we are taught that there is a distinct difference between boys and girls (other than the obvious difference in gender related body parts). Girls are supposed to be "delicate" while boys are bred to be "rough and tumble." As we grow, we notice that there are additional differences, with the main one being hormones. Girls are more "sensitive" and boys... well, boys just seem to be dense, testosterone driven morons during puberty. I always prided myself on being able to somewhat understand a guy's point of view, at least more than the average girl, and was pretty convinced I had guys pegged and could understand what they were thinking on an average basis. And then, at the age of 27, I decided to move back to Texas and not only live with 1, but 2 fully grown men (my fiance and his best friend/our brother of claims, Josh). And, do you know what I've learned in the four short months the three of us have been living together? Everything I thought I knew about guys is...
WRONG!!!
They are WAY worse than I thought! The two of them can sit on the couch and joke about how they hit each other in various body parts with a sledge hammer or what happened when a certain type of barbed wire wrapped around them while they were building a fence in the middle of nowhere and how much blood they lost! And they LAUGH at it! It's apparently funny for reasons I can't even fathom!
And, the words "I'm Bored," are words I've come to fear. "I'm Bored," usually means that something is going to be destroyed, taken apart, built, painted, altered, etc... in other words: One Big Mess! When the two of them get an off-the-wall idea and start plotting it out, I only have one word of advice. Beware! At which point, you can only do one of three things: 1. Try to convince them to do something else (which is pointless and you WILL lose that battle). 2. Offer to help (and possibly run the risk of becoming an accomplice if things go wrong). or 3. Sit back and try to find something else to occupy your time while they do whatever it is they are going to do and hope for the best. Personally, I've learned that the third option is the safest. In the four months that we've lived together, I can count on one hand the nights we've had that they DIDN'T get into something. Luckily, both of them are artistic (which is awesome) so their outlets usually flow in that direction but are also pretty costly at the same time.
I've also learned that titles such as "fat head," "dick," "ass," "dumb blond," "moron," "retard," "bitch," "pansy," etc. are actually terms of endearment! With these country boys, if they aren't making fun of you, they don't like you... seriously. Thankfully, I'm called "fat head" or "prostitutor" (don't ask) a lot around here. ;o)
This next lesson I've known for quite some time... it's my puberty-stricken daughter that has recently learned from this one. DO NOT, under any circumstances, ask any of these boys if the outfit, jeans, shirt, dress, etc. you are wearing makes you look fat! One, or both of them, will yell out from the other room, without even having seen you, "YES!" at the top of their lungs. They have no tact. Period. LOL... I've witnessed my daughter ask this honest question, expecting a certain response and then being blindsided by their verbal, one-worded assault. I'm sure this makes me a horrible mother, but I must say... it was HILARIOUS! Needless to say, I don't think she'll be asking that question again. Hehehehe...
Also, "determination" is an understatement with them. You cannot tell them that they can't do something. You WILL be proven wrong. Even if they didn't really have any intention of completing said "impossible" task, they will damn sure do it if you tell them they can't. Need to take off a tire to fix something on a motorcycle but don't have the proper way of lifting it? No problem! Sit back and watch the two of them perform the act of taking a crappy-ass jack and a piece of wood on top of the jack to lift the bike off of the ground while one of them fixes what needed to be fixed and the other one holds the teetering, heavy-ass bike so it doesn't fall. That was last just night's project. *shaking my head*
And, they can fix pretty much anything. Really, they can! For example, our destructive puppy decided to shred the power cord to the laptop into four pieces just recently. This is when I would usually run around the house trying to kill the dog, realize that the laptop is what I work on and is our main source of income, almost cry and then try to figure out how in the hell we're going to pay for another one when we are flat broke. Wrong again... Josh comes home, takes a look at the cord(s), and says "I can fix it." Fifteen minutes later... Bam! Cord is usable once again. I love it!!! Cabinet in the kitchen won't stay closed? Brendon says, "I can fix it." Five minutes later... Bam! Cabinet is closing properly. Computer not working? Either one of them: "I can fix it." Twenty minutes later... Bam! Computer is working better than it was before. It's like having two handymen on call 24/7. This is great!
I love them both dearly and they have taught me a lot more about guys than I really ever wanted to know. LOL. The best part is, even though the two of them can drive me crazy from time to time, it's always an adventure in our house. I can't wait to see what adventure today brings... :o)
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
And Now Time For A Bit Of Mush...
If I could have but one wish
I wish to wake up every day
To the sound of your breath on my neck,
The warmth of your lips on my cheek,
The touch of your fingers on my skin,
And the feel of your heart beating with mine...
Knowing that I could never find
That feeling with anyone but you
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Day In And Day Out
After my last entry, I decided to take an in depth look at the things I was considering and weighing my options carefully. I started really evaluating the different directions my life could have taken had I made different decisions and using somewhat logical thinking to determine where I would be now had I made those different decisions. The conclusion, after all of this over-analysis? No matter which path I would have taken, I would never feel fully fulfilled if I didn't have a family of my own. Period. End of story.
I could travel all over the world, see and do so many different things, change my life and leave everything behind at this very moment, but if I didn't have a family to come home to and someone to love and be loved by, my life would be empty. And, the fact that I have THIS family to come home to, makes things all the better.
My daughter and I have basically grown up with each other. From day one, she was stuck with a mother who was nothing more than a child herself and was nowhere near ready to be a mom. I was fifteen and still rebelling against life, puberty and most of all my parents. I had no idea what the world was like. But, together, she and I found out the hard way what it was like to never have enough money, the importance of education, that it's okay to make mistakes as long as you learn from them and many, many more lessons. The two of us continue to learn every single day, and I would have it no other way. I know that some may not think that this a fair enviornment to raise a child in and that perhaps I should have either given her up for adoption so that a "capable" family could have raised her in a better environment or perhaps even had an abortion and prevented the situation all together. But, to those people I only have one thing to say... "Mind your own fucking business!" My daughter may not have had every luxury in the world, but when she is older and has to fend for herself, she will know more than the average teenager and hopefully benefit from the trials we've gone through together. And through everything, the most important lesson I hope that I have instilled in her, is that no matter what family comes first.
And, now, with the direction my life has taken me in, and with the decisions I have made, I have the opportunity to be a part of three additional kiddo's lives. And, boy oh boy, what a crew they are! Lilly, age 2, is probably one of the coolest little girls I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. She stole my heart within the first thirty seconds of meeting her and I'm pretty sure, everyone else that has met her could say the same thing. Even at two years old, she knows exactly what she wants, doesn't care about anyone else's opinion and fears nothing. She's very laid back and is one of those kids that if left to her own devices, she could entertain herself for hours on end without a care in the world. And, with those huge brown eyes, curly brown hair and her cuddle bug nature, she can get just about anything she wants most of the time. She reminds me the most of Brendon.
Logan, age 4, is a toddler-sized ball of adorable energy. With big blue eyes and a dimple in each cheek the size of the grand canyon, he's going to be major trouble he gets older! He keeps me guessing in every situation, that's for sure. That little boy is learning the perfect balance, too. He can be rough and tumble (and packs quite a punch) when playing around with Daddy and still have the ability to know that with me, it's cuddle time and he has to be more gentle. He's also the most curious out of the bunch. A day with Logan wouldn't be complete without answering a million questions, trying to feed his inquizitive brain. I definitely don't mind answering those questions, either, but absolutely LOVE the look on his face when you give him an all too complicated answer and he's not quite sure how to take it. LOL.
Lauryn, age 6, is the most cautious. She is the "observer." If she's completely silent, you can almost gaurantee that she is evaluating the situation. She is also a nuturer, trying to care for her brother and sister as if she were a mother rather than big sister. You can count on Lauryn if you need a volunteer to help with the dishes or to help you make dinner. No matter what's going on, she wants to help! If left to her own devices, she finds comfort in a world of her own. She can carry on a conversation and play out whole scenes in a play, all in her head if there is no one bugging her. She and I haven't had issues, but she definitely took the longest to warm up to me.
As for Brendon, there aren't enough words in the world to be able to describe him! But, what I can say is that he loves with his ENTIRE heart. From day one, I have never felt anything other than complete, honest, knock your socks off, love. He has a persistant desire to make sure I'm happy (which I cannot even begin to understand) and puts 110% into everything he does. The fact that he's so in tune with me and my emotions, can sometimes be burdensome when I want to be in a bad mood and he won't let me, but that's a quality that goes in the plus column rather than negative any day. He's everything I did and didn't know I wanted, wrapped up in one gorgeous package.
Sooo... Where would my life be without my family? At this point, that's a question I don't even have the desire to answer because I would have it no other way.
I could travel all over the world, see and do so many different things, change my life and leave everything behind at this very moment, but if I didn't have a family to come home to and someone to love and be loved by, my life would be empty. And, the fact that I have THIS family to come home to, makes things all the better.
My daughter and I have basically grown up with each other. From day one, she was stuck with a mother who was nothing more than a child herself and was nowhere near ready to be a mom. I was fifteen and still rebelling against life, puberty and most of all my parents. I had no idea what the world was like. But, together, she and I found out the hard way what it was like to never have enough money, the importance of education, that it's okay to make mistakes as long as you learn from them and many, many more lessons. The two of us continue to learn every single day, and I would have it no other way. I know that some may not think that this a fair enviornment to raise a child in and that perhaps I should have either given her up for adoption so that a "capable" family could have raised her in a better environment or perhaps even had an abortion and prevented the situation all together. But, to those people I only have one thing to say... "Mind your own fucking business!" My daughter may not have had every luxury in the world, but when she is older and has to fend for herself, she will know more than the average teenager and hopefully benefit from the trials we've gone through together. And through everything, the most important lesson I hope that I have instilled in her, is that no matter what family comes first.
And, now, with the direction my life has taken me in, and with the decisions I have made, I have the opportunity to be a part of three additional kiddo's lives. And, boy oh boy, what a crew they are! Lilly, age 2, is probably one of the coolest little girls I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. She stole my heart within the first thirty seconds of meeting her and I'm pretty sure, everyone else that has met her could say the same thing. Even at two years old, she knows exactly what she wants, doesn't care about anyone else's opinion and fears nothing. She's very laid back and is one of those kids that if left to her own devices, she could entertain herself for hours on end without a care in the world. And, with those huge brown eyes, curly brown hair and her cuddle bug nature, she can get just about anything she wants most of the time. She reminds me the most of Brendon.
Logan, age 4, is a toddler-sized ball of adorable energy. With big blue eyes and a dimple in each cheek the size of the grand canyon, he's going to be major trouble he gets older! He keeps me guessing in every situation, that's for sure. That little boy is learning the perfect balance, too. He can be rough and tumble (and packs quite a punch) when playing around with Daddy and still have the ability to know that with me, it's cuddle time and he has to be more gentle. He's also the most curious out of the bunch. A day with Logan wouldn't be complete without answering a million questions, trying to feed his inquizitive brain. I definitely don't mind answering those questions, either, but absolutely LOVE the look on his face when you give him an all too complicated answer and he's not quite sure how to take it. LOL.
Lauryn, age 6, is the most cautious. She is the "observer." If she's completely silent, you can almost gaurantee that she is evaluating the situation. She is also a nuturer, trying to care for her brother and sister as if she were a mother rather than big sister. You can count on Lauryn if you need a volunteer to help with the dishes or to help you make dinner. No matter what's going on, she wants to help! If left to her own devices, she finds comfort in a world of her own. She can carry on a conversation and play out whole scenes in a play, all in her head if there is no one bugging her. She and I haven't had issues, but she definitely took the longest to warm up to me.
As for Brendon, there aren't enough words in the world to be able to describe him! But, what I can say is that he loves with his ENTIRE heart. From day one, I have never felt anything other than complete, honest, knock your socks off, love. He has a persistant desire to make sure I'm happy (which I cannot even begin to understand) and puts 110% into everything he does. The fact that he's so in tune with me and my emotions, can sometimes be burdensome when I want to be in a bad mood and he won't let me, but that's a quality that goes in the plus column rather than negative any day. He's everything I did and didn't know I wanted, wrapped up in one gorgeous package.
Sooo... Where would my life be without my family? At this point, that's a question I don't even have the desire to answer because I would have it no other way.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)